Set Higher Standards by YogiRavi

What you (or a customer, or a partner, etc.) do is far more powerful than what you say. We know in marketing that the best form of marketing is a referral from someone who has actually used and can vouch for a product. In family situations, kids learn best not by being told what to do, but by watching their parents and siblings. I witnessed this first-hand by observing my niece (who is almost 2) learn new words and skills just by watching others!

In whatever you do, if you want to be at cause – that is to say, if you want to create a change in any part of your workplace or you personal life – take action and let those actions speak for themselves. People will also be more receptive to a new idea if they aren’t sold on it. Best let them learn from your example.

Listening to the audio book for How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie. Read Part 1 and Part 2 for insights from the earlier portions of the book. Here are some insights from this evening’s listening:

• See things always from another person’s point of view – always, try as hard as you can to do this
• Be sympathetic with the other person’s ideas and desires
• Appeal to people’s nobler motives
• Use showmanship to get attention – movies do it, TV does it, window displays do it – and it works
• You can dramatize ideas in business or any other part of life – works great when dealing with adults and kids! Dramatize facts to make a point in a business setting. Use props if necessary to get your point across
• The way to get things done is to stimulate competition – in a healthy and productive way, throw down a challenge and see what happens!
• Work is the most motivating force for any worker, not money, benefits or anything else – quality and interesting work is the single biggest tool to keep people interested in their job
• Let other people do a great deal of the talking in any conversation
• It’s always easier to listen to criticism after you have given someone some praise – never just criticize, always see the positive aspects and comment on them first – them provide your thoughtful critique
• Providing criticism after praise is a technique used by many world leaders past and present (Lincoln, Coolidge, McKinley, etc.) in motivating staff an leading without making people feel bad
• Beginning with praise is like a dentist that begins with Novocaine!
• There is a way to redirect/correct/criticism without upsetting people – make others feel important (praise) while correcting
• People judge us by our “letters” – small errors, like spelling errors, make a big impression
• Humbling oneself and praising another can turn a staunch adversary into a close friend
• Admitting one’s own mistakes can motivate others to change their behavior for the better. For example, by quitting smoking – parents will set a positive example that children and friends will notice (and potentially follow)
• A good leader talks about their own mistakes before criticizing others

Listening to “How to Win Friends and Influence People ” by Dale Carnegie again. Here are some stream of conscious nuggets I’m picking up while listening. Read Part I for more nuggets.

• The best way to win an argument, is to avoid it.
• Quit telling people they are wrong, after all, how do you really know? You might be the one who is wrong. In other words, get used to admitting that you, in fact, might be wrong. It’s a disarming approach when dealing with people and shows respect for others opinions. Admitting you might be wrong will never get you into trouble.
• The word “My” has incredible force and impact. Use it carefully.
• Agree with your adversary quickly! Don’t argue with a customer, spouse or enemy. Use diplomacy.
• Never say to someone else “you’re wrong”.
• If you’re wrong, admit it quickly and emphatically!
• A drop of honey catches more flies than a gallon of “gaul”.
• The more yes’s you can induce from others early in a conversation – the positive momentum you can achieve toward a desired outcome. Saying yes is a powerful thing.
• Let others do a great deal of talking. Don’t interrupt others. Listen patiently and sincerely.
• Encourage others to express their ideas fully.